The thing that was bothering me is clearer now. The world wont change if dont come to office or not work on the ideas i put my heart and soul into. Thats what has been bothering me so much. thats what makes a hell of a difference to me i guess.

"One should strive to be the best in what one does and what work one does should be good by my standards. " Thats been my motto all along.

But i realize that it is incomplete. I have to change it to

"One should work in the core of any organization and then strive to be the best in what one does."

In a company, there are always high impact areas, the must have areas and the nice to have areas. There would potential must have areas that could become high impact in near future because of the people involved or because of the strategy of company. i always believe one should work for oneself and not for the company or organization. While working for oneself, one seeks satisfaction. the satisfaction does come from good work that would be the type of work one thinks is good. But this satisfaction is temporary, its a myth and like a spell. it would only be broken when the work gets done and the world doesnot change.

Thats what has been bothering me for so long, struggle to find what i wanted. Thats what i always wanted deep down but some how never got a chance to be in that position. Its essential to be identify a high impact area of the organization. Ideally it should be an area if it seizes to exist for the company, it impacts the whole organization. Offcourse there would always be must have areas for the company too. these would be future strategies, safe gaurds against a changing economy and possible high impacts of tomorrow. and then there would all those nice to have areas which are good if they give some returns and its still ok if they are not there tomorrow.

i realize now that for me its so very important to be in the core or high impact of the organization. being part of such an area, the effort, mind and soul that goes into work would worth its weight in gold. and satisfaction guarenteed.

the must have area also great areas to work for, they could become core some day. But one has to watch out carefully all the time. If the wind blows a different direction, one has to recognize that and shouldnt look the other way. Instead one should face the wind and move, move forward, move backward but definite move. any movements should be towards the other must have areas or if possible the current high impact area itself.

for me i have been working in nice to have areas or potential must have or to a must have area. Never in an high impact and thats what makes me go through these highs and lows in work.

lets see if things change, i know what to look for now.